In a scene that could be written into Latter Days 2: Saving New York, I stumbled upon a large group of Elders in the the 125th St. Subway Station. There were about 15 of them and they were singing America The Beautiful...kind of a mini Mormon Tabbernacle Choir. Each of them was cute, though none as cute as Steve Sandvoss, obviously. I stood there gawking at twink central and tried to pick out which ones would come out after their 2 year mandatory faith test was complete. Lemme tell you it was difficult -- what with those white sirts, black tie and oversized name badges they wore all merging together I couldn't tell who the members of the FHA were (Future Homos of America).
Apparently as I was watching them, 2 other Elders were watching me from the side. They approached me (one on either side, a strong-arm move if ever there was one) and asked if I liked what I was hearing. I lied and told them they sounded good and kept my eyes glued to the warbling fifteen.
"That song has it's roots in the Lord", the one to my left said.
I turned and looked at him. "She must be honored to have songs written about her," I said.
"Do you mean 'she' as in 'our country'?" he asked.
"I mean 'she' as in 'the Lord'," I repiled.
"Would you like to go sit and talk about the Lord?" the one to my right asked.
"Well, unless you personally know her and talk to her on a regular basis, then no."
"Perhaps we can change your views on Him."
"Perhaps I can change your views on homosexuality since I'm gay."
In a spasm of defience, Elder-Over-My-Left-Shoulder says,"Then let's talk." Ahhh..to be young and persistant.
"Do you two wanna come up to my apartment?," I asked. I knew this would shake 'em. And it did. They told me they would rather talk on a bench in the station and I told them I really had to get home...poke, prod, push, pull, etc. They finally gave me a card with the new Upper West Side Church's address on it and told me to come by one day: ANYONE there would be happy to talk to me.
So I gave them my card: a flyer to the Earl's Weiner Shack on Tuesdays. Cuz I'm sure there are many who would love to talk to them as well.
DISCLAIMER: The following blog was written NOT to discredit the Mormons, but rather to show how important it is to love yourself and believe in your own beliefs instead of trying to push those beliefs on someone else. In other words I will gladly accept your to-may-toe if you accept my to-mah-toe.
