This has been my mantra for the past 6 days and I can't believe I am finally getting some rest.
TUES: EARL'S WEINER SHACK is kicking ass. The anti-Beige theme is working quite nicely and guys are whipping their own weiners out left and right just to get a free drink. Otis Ray was the new dancer and he did a kick-ass job of lookin' as white trash as possible. Even our ghost hostess Wanda Pinkett is getting requests as to her exact whereabouts. This is all making me very happy...
WED: STAG PARTY was better considering we still haven't advertised or even listed it yet. Mayhaps it was the porn we have playing in our "lounge"...or mayhaps it was my roomie/go-go boy Michael that kept 'em there. It was obviously not my music because the bartender kept telling me what to play. Maybe he should stay off his phone during the night and concentrate on his tough job of opening beer bottles. But I joke. Kinda.
THURS: What can one say about PROZAC at Therapy? There's the usual Hellsea set cruising each other while I play campy movies and play rock-infused pop. In other words, it's always a great place to be. Plus I got a nice compliment from Jason of The Scissor Sisters who was drinking with Kiki and Herb. (Don't trip over those names I just dropped.)
FRI: Was at The Slide for Taylor Mac's new party Doppelganger in which Taylor wore hundreds of pumpkin seeds on his face. At one point I had the urge to sprinkle salt on his face, roast it in an oven, then chew on it. Like I was at a sofball game.
SAT: Was at my friend Gita's birthday party when I got paged, like a doctor on call, to come in to The Slide to spin for Corey Tut who was in the bathroom throwing up. So I quickly said my goodbyes, ran home to pick up my records, and cabbed it down to High Life/Low Life (I spun low while Nita spun high...so to speak. I know I've said this before, but Nita Aviance not only kicks ass as a DJ, but kicks ass as a human being as well...but I digress) The place was wall-to-wall hot men, Daniel hired twins to dance nekkid (with each other no less), and many stayed until we physically had to kick them out. The plus was getting to be part of the anniversary celebration..the minus was not getting to be part of my good friend's birthday celebration and for that I'm truly sorry.
SUN: BYO-DJ premieres with DJ Jeremy Blacklow as our first amateur DJ in his East Village debut. Jeremy did a great job playing songs that made me nothing but happy such as Juice Newton'sQueen of Hearts and Hall and Oates'You Make My Dreams Come True. J-Low was not only read'-to-go but had energy and then some (which after working 5 days in a row I was in strong need of). His boyfriend's gonna be spinning next week.
Afterwards, I went down to Bar 6 in the Lower east Side where I finally met Bryan Raughton (aka MumbleFuck) at a new party he and DJ Jimmy are spinning. I read his blog every now and then, had heard his name throughout the bar set, and must say I was impressed -- he was a very cool guy who immediately made me laugh with his previous night's story of spinning Redneck Runway at SBNY. Something to do with falling turntables... Gonna have to make it to SBNY one Saturday to hear him turn it out.
I'm now going to read a book and shut out the rest of the world for a while.
I just got a virus on my computer... The e-mail said this:
You have just received the Amish virus. As the Amish don't have any technology or programming experience, this virus works on the honor system.
Please delete all the files from your hard drive and manually forward this virus to everyone on your mailing list. Thank you for your cooperation.(Thanks Richie)
Unlike everyone else who went to see the latest intelligent Charlie Kaufman film, I went against my better judgement and saw Dawn Of The Dead Friday night. And I loved it. Not only was it intelligent, but was more thriller than gore-fest. And the music is genius...or should I say muszak as most of the background music was just that. Examples: When the first 5 arrive at their self-appointed safehouse "Don't Worry Be Happy" was playing throughout the mall. Mekhi Phifer goes to check on the doors to see if they're locked and "All By Myself" is playing. "You Light Up My Life" is playing while one of the mall security guards goes to check out the mall power/security center. Even Air Supply's "I'm All Outta Love" is playing when the unaffected get away from the undead by running into an elevator.
What gives? This shouldn't happen to a woman who was the first televangelist to openly pray for those afflicted with AIDS when the epidemic began. She not only accepted gays into their ministry, she had those afflicted with the HIV/AIDS on her show to let others in on the reality of what it was doing to those afflicted.
And now MTV has lost one of it's original "fab five". My heart goes out to Martha, Alan, Nina, and Mark.
* Patmix has organized a moment of silence for those who lost their lives in Madrid. "On the one week anniversary of the bombings, Thursday, March 18th at 12 Noon, New Yorkers will show their support for the people of Madrid by going to the closest sidewalk and observing two minutes of silence. Spread the word."
Well, for the past week I have been sick as a D.O.G., y'all. I was ache-y, coughing, was congested and my right ear was clogged (it sounded like everything was underwater). I finally high-tailed it out of the city on Friday to the comforts of my mom's house in CT to rest and watch her dogs for a couple of days. She picked me up from the train station and we went straight to the doctor's where I was diagnosed with an inner ear infection brough on by a cold (which I have yet to shake).
So now I'm on amoxicillin and TheraFlu and am trying to pull it together for tonight's Magnum party. My spinning skills should be interesting...spinning with only one good ear and all.
[Buffalo Bill] It rubs the lotion on its skin
It does this when it's told
It rubs the lotion on its skin
Or else it gets the hose
And when it's done there's one more thing
A simple little task, it's:
Put the fucking lotion in the basket.
My friends Charlie, Erik and I started playing this game a few years ago that's fun to play and can continue forever... The game is played by morphing 2 movie titles into one (and they must be film titles...not tv shows; that's another game entirely). Here are some examples:
Briget Jones' Diary of Anne Frank The Sixth Sense and Sensibility You Can't Stop The Music, Man Room With A View To A Kill Showgirlfight Sister Action Jackson Arachna-for-the-boys Selena On Me Almost Perfect Storm There's Something About Mary Reilly Funny Girl, Interrupted A Time to Kill A Mockingbird Pieces of Enchanted April Welcome to the Dollhouse On Haunted Hill The Phantom Menace 2 Society Bring It On, Golden Pond
And my friend Scott R. from LA just sent me these: Jesus Christ Super Starsky and Hutch A Starsky and Hutch is Born Win 50 First Dates with Ted Hamilton 6 Latter Days and Nights
Before telling you which one was deemed "My Type", I wanna give you a few results from the quiz. I was told that:
* My photo choices suggest a man over 40 is probably getting a little old for your tastes (not an Anna Nicole)
* I seemed interested in dating a man at least 25 or older (not into "twinks")
* I liked very handsome men (and who doesn't...?)
* A lot of the features I liked are not especially popular / they're not what usually defines "mainstream" attractiveness for men. (VERY true...if you have a wandering eye, I'm all over you)
* Some may call one of [my] types "Pretty Boys," (did it not just tell me I liked "features that were not mainstream"???)
* I liked long and narrow "rectangular" faces / I prefered "Ecto-Mesomorphs," with narrow chins and nicely angular faces. (sometimes)
* I seemed especially interested in men with green eyes (um...okay)
* I also appeared to like a number of guys we refer to as "Surfer Dudes." (you can take the boy out of California...)
* I'm very selective. (see also: very picky)
* I prefer to date men who are about the same height I am, or maybe up to 2 inches taller. (oh my god...I'm a height-ist!)
* I've shown that I'm open to men who wear glasses (VERY true...ask AJ)
* I preferred men to have nice average-sized lips; not too thin and not too full (sorry Steven Tyler)
* A good head of hair is a real turn on for me, but I gave special attention to men with short , deep brown hair (but dirty blondes are hot, too)
They then told me that #5 was the most my type with #3 coming in second and #4/#1 coming in third. (#2 was my surfer-boy type) This descision was, I guess, based on the fact that "I seemed to like bald men who were attractive and had an especially masculine look." No offense to those who haven't a-hair-on-their-head but I do sometimes prefer guys with shaved heads a la G.I. Joe -- not so much with the Kojak look.
I guess my point is that "my type" is all over the map...my preferences change by the minute. Too bad outgoing and funny-as-hell aren't physical traits because it could be narrowed down even further.
Whew!...I made it onto the coveted link list of the queen (aka the shit). I feel like I can finally sit down in this Marc Jacobs debutante gown.
I'm honored and wish we had known each other when you lived in the fair city of york they've dubbed new. I'm the tragic to your hip...the plain to your pretty...the pleasant to your cunt (which, around here, is a hard thing to be -- trust).
Patmix sent me this last night, and I thought I'd post it:
This is a letter from Bette Midler to President Bush.
Dear President Bush,
Today you called upon Congress to move quickly to amend the US Constitution, and set in Federal stone a legal definition of marriage. I would like to know why.
In your speech, you stated that this Amendment would serve to protect marriage in America, which I must confess confuses me. Like you, I believe in the importance of marriage and I feel that we as a society take the institution far too lightly. In my circle of family, friends and acquaintances, the vast majority have married and divorced -- some more than once. Still, I believe in marriage. I believe that there is something fundamental about finding another person on this planet with whom you want to build a life and family, and make a positive contribution to society. I believe that we need more positive role models for successful marriage in this country -- something to counteract the images we get bombarded with in popular culture. When we are assaulted with images of celebrities of varying genres, be it actors, sports figures, socialites, or even politicians who shrug marriage on and off like the latest fashion, it is vitally important to the face of our nation, for our children and our future, that we have a balance of commitment and fidelity with which to stave off the negativity. I search for these examples to show my own daughter, so that she can see that marriage is more than a disposable whim, despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
As a father, I'm sure you have faced these same concerns and difficulties in raising your own daughters. Therefore I can also imagine that you must understand how thrilled I have been over the past few weeks to come home and turn on the news with my family. To finally have concrete examples of true commitment, honest love, and steadfast fidelity was such a relief and a joy. Instead of speaking in the hypothetical, I was finally able to point to these men and women, standing together for hours in the pouring rain, and tell my child that this is what its all about. Forget Britney. Forget Kobe. Forget Strom. Forget about all the people that we know who have taken so frivolously the pure and simple beauty of love and tarnished it so consistently. Look instead at the joy in the beautiful faces of Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon - 51 years together! I mean, honestly Mr. President - how many couples do you know who are together for 51 years? I'm sure you agree that this love story provides a wonderful opportunity to teach our children about the true meaning and value of marriage. On the steps of San Francisco City Hall, rose petals and champagne, suits and veils, horns honking and elation in the streets; a celebration of love the likes of which this society has never seen.
This morning, however, my joy turned to sadness, my relief transformed into outrage, and my peace became anger. This morning, I watched you stand before this nation and belittle these women, the thousands who stood with them, and the countless millions who wish to follow them. How could you do that, Mr. President? How could you take something so beautiful -- a clear and defining example of the true nature of commitment -- and declare it to be anything less? What is it that validates your marriage which somehow doesn't apply to Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon? By what power, what authority are you so divinely imbued that you can stand before me and this nation and hold their love to a higher standard?
Don't speak to me about homosexuality, Mr. President. Don't tell me that the difference lies in the bedroom. I would never presume to ask you or your wife how it is you choose to physically express your love for one another, and I defy you to stand before Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon and ask them to do the same. It is none of my business, as it is none of yours, and it has nothing to do with the "sanctity of marriage." I'm sure you would agree that marriage is far more than sexual expression, and its high time we all started focusing on all the other aspects of a relationship which hold it together over the course of a lifetime. Therefore, with the mechanics of sex set aside, I ask you again -- what makes a marriage? I firmly believe that whatever definition you derive, there are thousands upon thousands of shining examples for you to embrace.
You want to protect marriage. I admire and support that, Mr. President. Together, as a nation, let us find and celebrate examples of what a marriage should be. Together, let us take couples who embody the principles of commitment, fidelity, sacrifice and love, and hold them up before our children as role models for their own futures. Together, let us reinforce the concept that love is about far more than sex, despite what popular culture would like them to believe.
Please, for the sake of our children, for the sake of our society, for the sake of our future, do not take us down this road. Under the guise of protection, do not support divisiveness. Under the guise of unity, do not endorse discrimination. Under the guise of sanctity, do not devalue commitment. Under the guise of democracy, do not encourage this amendment.
A big welcome to my friend (and fellow DJ) Pat who joined the blogosphere today... his site has been started because he has "scary little thoughts going on in [his] head" and "couldn't hold [his] fire any longer."
Also...thanks to Andy and Cybersocket for including me in your "Attack of the Blogs" piece...
And thanks also to soblo for recognizing my narcissism. You get it.
Alright, so here are the details of my weekend in L.A. (as bland as they may be to some...):
FRIDAY: Arrived in Long Beach at 8pm where AJ picks me up and I see 2 NY-ers (both actors from Atlantic...here for the Oscars, gentlemen?). We eat Mexican which I've been craving desperately and it is good. AJ and I stop by Here Lounge to see my friend Mark who is bartending. Bump into Carlos and John (two more NY-ers). Down a couple super-sized margaritas then home to spend time with AJ.
SATURDAY: AJ takes me to the uber-trendy L.A. coffee chain Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf where I order an ice blended. Wasn't impressed -- too milky; still dunno what Britney and Cameron D. see in them. Spot Brooke Adams (Monk's wife...not the bitch who's Lace's mother) getting her morning trendy on. AJ drops me off at the Metro which I take to Long Beach to meet up with Dad and his wife Barbara. The three of us drive down to Laguna, where we spend the afternoon shopping downtown Laguna with Barbara's son Scott, daughter-in-law Cindy, and granddaughter Chelsea. I am on the ONLY search for sunglasses. None are found. A Jamba Juice was in order for me and Chelsea so we ditched the others and got them (yes, full of sugar...I know). The six of us go back to Scott and Cindy's beach house, drink wine, and watch the sunset. A perfect afternoon, I must say...
That night, the six of us go dinner at an island themed restaurant called Cabana where I spot yet another New Yorker (though his name escapes me...) After dinner, Bob-n-Scott come and pick me to take me up to L.A. for some homosexual hijinks. We meet up with AJ at Hot Dog hosted by the former "King of the East Village" Mario Diazwho has successfully brought the East Village to Hollywood...and for that I'm impressed. As soon as we walk in the door, yours truly has to use the restroom due to his lactose intolerance, and since there are no doors at this fine establishment, Bob and I head across the street to The Pleaure Chest to use their facilities (they have a DJ spinning there on Sat. nights...). After cackling a bit over my incontinence, we head back to the waiting Scott and AJ. We drink, do shots, dance, sweat...basically have a great time. STAR SIGHTING: the incomparable ::Matty:: (New Yorker number 6). Always good to see Parker's mommy out and about... After Hot Dog, we march on over to The Spike for a quick after-hours spin on the dance floor. Even after a Red Bull, it's still boring so we leave (but not before seeing 2 other New Yorkers...names withheld.) We say out goodbyes and AJ and I go back to his place.
SUNDAY: My phone waked AJ and I up and it's Mark who wants to meet at Hugo for brunch. We shower, change and meet him in front of Hugo's where he introduces us to his friend Wilson Cruz. Too many pre-Oscar eaters at Hugo's, so we venture off to Basix (a gay eatery). Food is good. Bellini is best. After AJ and I say goodbye to Miss Mark, we head off to The Grove which I creeps me out (think: Disneyland's Main Street meets Hollywood backlot). More sunglass searching. Still nothing. We go back to AJ's apartment to watch Joan and Melissa and wait for Jenn to take us to AJ's friend's house for the Oscars. We sleep through all 4 hours of the Lord of the Oscars, then go home.
MONDAY: Post-Oscar losers are those who surround us at breakfast on Sunset and most look hung-over and tired. I pittied them all for not being from New Zealand. After leaving the misery behind, AJ and I decide to see a movie, but have time to kill beforehand, so we drive to Santa Monica. The two of us walk the 3rd St. Promenade, AGAIN with my sunglass seach. Find some that work, but don't wanna spend the $ they require. My search continues... We then pop over to WeHo for a quick bite (of Mexican, of course) and the rain starts. AJ and I drive over to Melrose and see Latter Days which we liked...if only for the actors and the story's outline otherwise...not so much. AJ then ends my trip by taking me to an incredible sushi dinner at Hump at the Santa Monica Airport. Strange place for a restaurant, but the fish was amazing. Afterwards, AJ drives me to the Long Beach Airport where we say our quick goodbyes. It's the first time we have said it since we met on New Year's...
I walk up to get my ticket and something falls at my feet. It's a brand new pair of Chanelsunglasses, still in their case. I (timidly) look around for who they may belong to..but, alack, they're mine.